Dave Engstrom wants what any parent desires for their children — equality and fairness.
But he’s frustrated that his 29-year-old lesbian daughter can’t count on receiving the equal and fair treatment his married daughter or his 17-year-old son may take for granted.
“I’m very protective of all of my kids,” Dave said. “You’d like them to get a fair shot and equal treatment on everything, and I know she doesn’t.”
Recently, Dave’s daughter began working for a company that offers health benefits to domestic partners. His daughter, who is in a committed relationship, was thrilled to find an employer that considers her as valuable as its other employees.
“It’s not so much the benefits, but the acceptance,” Dave said. “I’m happy she has a good, stable relationship. She needs someone just as everyone does. It’s difficult to go through life alone.”
Dave has been married for 31 years and currently lives in Afton, Minn., with his wife and son. He has served as City of Afton mayor and was a two-term Washington County commissioner. As commissioner, he served on the county’s social services advisory committee.
“Over and over again, you’d see that preventative funding is always the best,” Dave said. “When you can support stable relationships and families, it benefits everybody long-term. But when you go through life alone or you’re being discriminated against, there are more problems and you need more help, but you can’t get it because state law may prohibit it.”
Dave is currently a lobbyist at the state capitol and thinks it is “outrageous” and “shocking” that so many state laws exclude committed and long-term partners. “Just hearing that number has enlightened me and will cause me to consider in my own work how future laws affect people and their relationships,” he said. “Hopefully this report will highlight those laws that should be straightened out or eliminated.
“There should be no discrimination, whether people are same-sex or opposite-sex partners,” Dave continued. “As a parent of a lesbian daughter, I want what I expect for all three of my children: equality and fairness, whether they’re gay, lesbian or straight.”
